Episode 4 Anderson tape script (partial)
This Anderson Tape is brought to you by Jaymach File Sharing Services.
The topic I'll be ranting about is KOTOR fanboys. You know the pattern: "Revan wuz liek the most talented Jedi evar!" or "Omg revan would pwn Vader!"
To quote Kwenn, from his Un-Wookieepedia userpage: "Damn you, Obsidian! Damn you all to hell!" He actually ascribes this quote to me, and why, I think they can live, especially since Neverwinter Nights 2 totally redeemed them after the TSL screwup... but what's with all the Revan gushing?
You see, Revan is supposedly "the heart of the Force". Now if you've seen the TV tropes wiki, or Captain Planet and the Planeteers, you're probably questioning: What kind of lame power is heart anyway? Not nearly as powerful as fire, wind or earth.
And Revan did fall to the dark side. It's as true as the fact that your blue embodiement of Twi'lek hotness is dead, and I'm not talking about Mission Vao here. Deal with it. You see, if you believe Revan didn't fall based on what Kreia says, you should also believe the Exile was more powerful, also based on what Kreia says. But that is unacceptable, because Revan is DA ROXORZ! I mean, what kind of a senile old hag Kreia must have been to call the Exile her greatest student, when she also trained the great Revan? So if you're a Revan fanboy, don't believe everything she says. Unless you want to end up on the dark side. Or the double standards side. A very unpleasant side that is.
As for the genders, sometimes I wish Obsidian inserted something like this into TSL, during the first conversation with Atton: Atton: What do you know about Revan? Exile: Well, Revan was the woman who... Atton: WRONG!
Or someone else can redeem for what Obsidian has done with this "Revan customization" thing. You see, in your personal continuity, they're probably both male, unless you're a fan fiction writer, in which case they're probably both female. And in that case, there's good chance you're female too and we've met on the Freenode IRC where you mocked my strict adherence to canon, so there.
Dear Lucasfilm and Dark Horse, if you're listening to this, please slap a canonical name on the Exile in the KOTOR comics. It's getting boring on Wookieepedia now that the vandalism of her article nearly stopped, and we need more. Optionally, you can include Mount Sorrow in Legacy instead - I can guarantee an outcry even greater than with the "Pants" article and all these superb Star Trek articles that are or will be written by our glorious hosting provider. After all, you have already crossed the line with Darth Crate and Darth Cruel, so John can just as well stick to his "it's just a myth" belief to counter the efforts of Abel and Dan to keep canon from going boom.
With that, I depart - thank you for suffering!
The topic I'll be ranting about is KOTOR fanboys. You know the pattern: "Revan wuz liek the most talented Jedi evar!" or "Omg revan would pwn Vader!"
To quote Kwenn, from his Un-Wookieepedia userpage: "Damn you, Obsidian! Damn you all to hell!" He actually ascribes this quote to me, and why, I think they can live, especially since Neverwinter Nights 2 totally redeemed them after the TSL screwup... but what's with all the Revan gushing?
You see, Revan is supposedly "the heart of the Force". Now if you've seen the TV tropes wiki, or Captain Planet and the Planeteers, you're probably questioning: What kind of lame power is heart anyway? Not nearly as powerful as fire, wind or earth.
And Revan did fall to the dark side. It's as true as the fact that your blue embodiement of Twi'lek hotness is dead, and I'm not talking about Mission Vao here. Deal with it. You see, if you believe Revan didn't fall based on what Kreia says, you should also believe the Exile was more powerful, also based on what Kreia says. But that is unacceptable, because Revan is DA ROXORZ! I mean, what kind of a senile old hag Kreia must have been to call the Exile her greatest student, when she also trained the great Revan? So if you're a Revan fanboy, don't believe everything she says. Unless you want to end up on the dark side. Or the double standards side. A very unpleasant side that is.
As for the genders, sometimes I wish Obsidian inserted something like this into TSL, during the first conversation with Atton: Atton: What do you know about Revan? Exile: Well, Revan was the woman who... Atton: WRONG!
Or someone else can redeem for what Obsidian has done with this "Revan customization" thing. You see, in your personal continuity, they're probably both male, unless you're a fan fiction writer, in which case they're probably both female. And in that case, there's good chance you're female too and we've met on the Freenode IRC where you mocked my strict adherence to canon, so there.
Dear Lucasfilm and Dark Horse, if you're listening to this, please slap a canonical name on the Exile in the KOTOR comics. It's getting boring on Wookieepedia now that the vandalism of her article nearly stopped, and we need more. Optionally, you can include Mount Sorrow in Legacy instead - I can guarantee an outcry even greater than with the "Pants" article and all these superb Star Trek articles that are or will be written by our glorious hosting provider. After all, you have already crossed the line with Darth Crate and Darth Cruel, so John can just as well stick to his "it's just a myth" belief to counter the efforts of Abel and Dan to keep canon from going boom.
With that, I depart - thank you for suffering!
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